Regarding the CWs whereabouts on the evening of February 9, 2004, after he left work at 7 pm.
Now the CW, he be sumptin else. Whoa, Nelly!
He stopped off on in Easton on his way home from work in Franconia to attend the weekly Monday night meeting of the Young American Satanic Worshippers for Christ, or YASWICS WITH A SILENT C, as they prefer to call themselves because ... well, by golly, they have to cuz otherwise it upsets the tourists and dats bad fo bidness.
Ever so offen dey get sum born-again Christians wander in off da street tinkin dat YAHWEH dude from the Bible, yeah. Dat Dude. Yumpin Yesus dat dude scare me. Yeah, he got no sense of humor an he bad fer bidness too, uhm, yeah..
So, we wuz bout to sacrifice a peripuh ... peripuh ... ah cain' say it widdout spittin, man. Any way dis duck. We goin fire it up.
Yeah, do dah ashes to ashes dust to dust thang dah kids like.
Well, I lites da torch an da CW, he look at me an he say don' do dat.
Yeah, but I don want mah kids to cry, right? So ah shoots him. A mans gotta do what a mans gotta do, right? Uhm, yeah. But I misses him an he runs outta dah place.
So we hands out dah torches. Dey ain't cheap, yeah, ah knows dat. Even giv one to da peripuh ... perpuh ... don' you lookit me like dat. Ah told you, ah cain' say it widdout spittin, man. Anyway, ah give one to dis duck an she goes Quack.
Ah axes her if she speak Quack too.
She say Gort, Quack Too Barrata Nick Toe.
Uhm, yeah. Ah nods my head, right?
Dat Gort, he bad fer bidness too, jes like Nick Toe an Yahwee.
Off we go. Yeah, da Christians too. We chases da CW all da way to his place, but by da time we gets dere, we ain't got no lite no mo.
Uhm, yeah. So we sees dis big ol' bus. Uhm, yeah. Yellow bus, big as da sky.
Ah sees Cecil. Hey, Cecil. What chu doin, man?
He don say nuttin. He jes keeps pullin sumptin outta da gas tank.
Yumpin Yeesus! Ah asks him WTF is dat?
An Billy say ... Billy who? Alls ah know is he got hisself a nice house but he sleep in a tent outside. Uhm, yeah. An he do'n wear no skivvies, neither. An folks tink we weird. Uhm, yeah.
OK, so we wrings out da girl dat came outta da gas tank an lites da torches again an we heads to da stage stop fo a BBQ. Uhm, yeah
Bess service ah ever had.